namaste: (Default)
namaste ([personal profile] namaste) wrote2007-11-04 12:15 pm

Football Fic: College Game Day

Title: College Game Day
Author: Namaste
Summary: With a season-long bet at stake, House and Wilson watch a ball game. More fluff. Part of the ongoing football series, which began with Go Blue and continued in Hail To the Victors? and Tailgating
Author’s Note: Warning, the following is a fic experiment, to try and write a fic “live” during the Michigan, Michigan State game, as if we’re watching House and Wilson watch the game. I cleaned it up for formatting, but if it works, I may try to do one that’s actually updated live during bowl season. Let me know if I should try.

“Causes of retinal detachment in an 18-year-old?” House asked.

“You want to run a differential during a football game?”

“Why not? It’s more interesting than Michigan State’s offense.”




First quarter, 9:03 left: Michigan State 3, Michigan 0

“You’re late.”

Wilson tossed his jacket on a chair. “I had a patient.” He looked at the TV. “Michigan State’s scored already?”

“Yes,” House said, “and you’re lying. I checked. You spent six hours doing paperwork.”

“How do you ...” Wilson remembered seeing Taub in the cafeteria, and Brennan in the hallway. “You know, maybe you could have your team spend their time -- I don’t know -- working with patients.”

House grabbed a handful of potato chips from the bag on the coffee table. “They already know how to hold patients’ hands. They need to learn some far more important skills.”

“Like spying on me?”

“Cuddy’s out of town. You were the second choice.”


-------

First quarter, 4:27 left: Michigan State 3, Michigan 0


“I’m surprised they’re playing Hart.” Wilson opened his beer and took a drink.

“Why not? I checked his films. It’s just a soft tissue injury.”

“Sure, but soft tissue can still be...” Wilson turned to House. “Wait a minute, you checked his films?”

House nodded. “The x-ray and the MRI.”

“How did you get your hands on them?

“I know a guy.

“Any of these guys you know ever hear of patient confidentiality?”

House put down his beer, looked at Wilson. “How long have you known me?”

“Right. Stupid question.”

Wilson shook his head and looked at the screen, watched as the Hart broke free of the tacklers. “Here he goes!” Nessler shouted out from the broadcast booth on the TV. “Still on his feet. If there was still any doubt about Hart’s ankle ...”

“Told you,” House said.

Wilson sighed.

-------


Second quarter, 11:58: Michigan 7, Michigan State 3


House was in the kitchen when Nessler mentioned that both Bob Griese and Paul McQuire were wearing sweater vests. Wilson flinched. Maybe House didn’t hear.

“Wow, so that’s where you get your styling cues from.” House handed Wilson another beer. “All this time, I thought it was Great Uncle Edgar down at the nursing home.”

“One,” Wilson said, “I own one sweater vest.”

House shook his head. “Two. You forgot the blue one your mother gave you two years ago.”

“OK, two, but so what?” Wilson shrugged. “They’re warm.”

“So are flannel jammies, but you won’t see me wearing them in public.”

-----

Second quarter, 3:58: Michigan 14, Michigan State 3


“I had a detached retina.” House leaned forward as Michigan State’s injured backup quarterback spoke to the sideline reporter. “It came out of nowhere.”

“Causes of retinal detachment in an 18-year-old?” House asked.

“You want to run a differential during a football game?”

“Why not? It’s more interesting than Michigan State’s offense.”

Wilson studied the player on the TV screen. “Injury is most likely, especially in a college football player,” he said. “One too many hits.”

“Boring. What else?”

“What makes you think it’s not from an injury?”

“Because it’s not the right answer.” House tapped his cane against the coffee table. “What else?”

“You already know?”

“Of course. So, causes of a detached retina?”

“Why don’t you save the quizzes for your team? It’d give them something to do until you drag your sorry ass in every day.”

“Quit stalling.”

Wilson sighed, stared out the window. “Severe myopia, some forms of diabetes or sickle cell, neovascularization ...” He looked over at House. “Should I continue?”

House grunted. “That was the easy question,” he said. “Let’s see how you do on something a little trickier next time.”


-------

Halftime: Michigan 14, Michigan State 3


“Why do I have to pay for the pizza?”

“Because you’re not cooking.”

“I don’t always want to cook, you know.”

“But yet you always do.”

“Not this time. And you still haven’t explained why I have to pay this time.”

“Because I paid for the beer.”

“Funny, this looks exactly like the same beer I picked up a couple of days ago.”

“Same brand; not the same beer. And I bought chips.”

“One bag.”

“You ate half.”

“Fine. I’m too hungry to argue. Just make the call.”


-------

Third quarter , 5:35: Michigan 14, Michigan State 10


House winced slightly as Hart limped back onto the field.

“Michigan only won the first half of the football game,” McQuire said from the booth. “You got to come out and play the second half.”

“Time to drag out the sports clichés,” House said. “How about, ‘He gave 110 percent.’”

“Or, ‘It’s not over until it’s over,’” Wilson said.

“It’s a game of inches.”

“It’s a whole new ball game.”

“That was a gutsy play.”

“That was a textbook play.”

“They just have to go out and execute.”

“They’re marching down the field.”

“Michigan State is winning the battle of the trenches.” Nessler said from the TV.

“Good one,” House said.


--------


Fourth quarter, 7:40: Michigan State 24, Michigan 14


“You worried?”

“No.”

“No?”

“Why should I?”

“Because your team is losing?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“It doesn’t?”

“Let’s say Michigan loses today,” House said.

“Like they are?”

House ignored him. “Then they lose to Wisconsin. Then they lose to Ohio State.”

“Like they will?”

“Worst case scenario, they don’t get a bowl game, which means that all bets are off. I don’t owe you anything.” House grabbed the last piece of pizza out of the box. “Or, they do get a bowl game, but it’s a small one, against a lousy Division II school that will completely fold, and I get free food for the next four months.”

“Appalachian State was Division II.”

“Would you forget about Appalachian State?”


---------


Fourth quarter, 3:11: Michigan State 24, Michigan 21

House leaned forward and cheered as Manningham caught the pass and broke free, getting another first down.

“Right,” Wilson said. “You don’t care who wins at all.”

“It’s a good game,” House said. “Cheering for sports teams is an all-American activity.”

“So why weren’t you cheering for Michigan State five minutes ago?”

“I was cheering on the inside. Now be quiet.”

---------


Fourth quarter, 2:28: Michigan 28, Michigan State 24


“Better get ready to share your antidepressants with Phillips.”

“He didn’t go to Michigan State.”

“No, but he bet on them.”

“How many bets do you have going on out there?”

“Don’t be jealous.”

“I’m not, just ... curious.”

“A few. And you’re jealous.”

“No, curious. Phillips doesn’t even like talking to you.”

“But he likes winning. And for some reason he somehow got his hands on Mike Hart’s films and thinks Hart has a hairline fracture.”

“You said his films were clean.”

“They are. But somehow Hart’s name ended up on someone else’s films who happened to have a hairline fracture.”

“And I suppose he’ll never know just how he happened to get those films?”

“Hey, he was the one who thought he had inside information and came to me waving around a hundred dollar bill. It was his idea.”

“And did anyone else happen to get those films?”

“Nope. Not yet, anyway.”


--------


Final score: Michigan 28, Michigan State 24


“Good game.” Wilson picked up the pizza box and the empty beer bottles.

“I’ve seen worse.”

“Like during bowl games?”

“Don’t start counting your money yet.” House followed Wilson into the kitchen.

“I think I can.” Wilson tossed the box into the garbage can and rinsed out the bottles. “I was double checking Michigan’s bowl game stats. And like you said, the better they play now, the better the team they’ll face in January.”

“And I was double checking how many meals you’ll have to make.” House leaned against the counter. “How are you at making crepes?”

“Very good. Shame you’ll never know for sure.”

Wilson walked back into the living room and grabbed his jacket. “What time is next week’s game?”

“Noon.”

“I’ll bring chips,” he said, and zipped up his jacket. “You’re buying the pizza.”

House stood next to the couch. “Want to bet?”

Wilson paused, then shook his head. “Not this time.” He opened the door. “Good night, House.”


[identity profile] aestheticized.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 05:28 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't like football, I don't know football, and many of these jokes thus go WAY over head. Yet I love these stories anyway. They just feel so completely natural. Wonderful.

Randomly? Extended inversion (or as I know it, "hanging upside down for a long time") can also cause retinal detachment.

[identity profile] stovetop00.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 05:51 pm (UTC)(link)
“Appalachian State was Division II.”

“Would you forget about Appalachian State?”


lol.

This was great. Very in character. And I don't remember seeing a lot of sport-fics in this fandom that didn't include either WWE or monster trucks.

(Anonymous) 2007-11-04 06:10 pm (UTC)(link)
What she said. In particular I liked them reciting sports cliches (my brother is a sports journalist and says that coming up with a different way of saying "so-and-so won the game" every day is very hard to do), House switching films to win a bet, and Wilson being jealous of House being friendly with someone else. And Wilson winning these bets for a change, though that's out of your control!
Taiga

[identity profile] kidsnurse.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 06:28 pm (UTC)(link)
loved it, loved it, loved it! every bit as much fun as watching the gators yesterday, and way more fun than watching the gators last saturday. definitely looking forward to more in this series!

[identity profile] avidreadergirl.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 06:30 pm (UTC)(link)
This was great. Way to make football actually interesting and entertaining. Great work looking forward to next week!
Oh and I think I cursed Wilson, sports teams I root for loose, and since I want Wilson to win (since I think loosing occasionally is good for House) that means Michigan should clean up. :::sigh:::: sorry.

[identity profile] nieded.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 07:06 pm (UTC)(link)
House ignored him. “Then they lose to Wisconsin. Then they lose to Ohio State.”

WHOO Wisconsin! Except we just lost a game yesterday *sigh*. Oh well.

Awesome fic. I'm excited for the next part.

[identity profile] smoothzeta69.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 07:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Aww, I loved this even with my minimal knowledege of anything football related. So them.

“And I was double checking how many meals you’ll have to make.” House leaned against the counter. “How are you at making crepes?”

“Very good. Shame you’ll never know for sure.”

Made me :)

[identity profile] chase-austenfan.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 07:28 pm (UTC)(link)
LOVED... Love watching MI and now when I do I can think of House and Wilson watching too... *squees happily*

House checking out the film pre-game- Brilliant!
The football cliches cracked me up- some of those you could play drinking games with they are repeated so frequently.

And I feel like I have to apologize to Wilson because as much as I'd love for him to win- he's rooting against the wrong team. *teasing grin*

I'd love to see more- nothing like teaming up a couple of my favs to put me in a great mood. :)

[identity profile] tsuzuki13.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 07:43 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, so that's who won the game. I was wondered why everyone was so worked up this morning. >.> I live in Michigan, and I didn't know this. XD

Most of the football related stuff went right over my head, but it was still fun to read. <3

[identity profile] phineas-gatsby.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 08:00 pm (UTC)(link)
awww...i love these stories! I love college football (and you know that I WILL continue to say "Appalachian State" with a smirk every time some Michigan kid is in DC), and this is completely in character and so, so funny. Ahhh, Michigan...right up there with Notre Dame. Teehee.

But yeah, these stories are all so much fun. Will you be continuing with basketball? :-)

[identity profile] namasteyoga.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 08:00 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm not a big fan of football, but I watch it a bit -- more this year.

And officially they've only said that the MSU QB's eye issue is "degenerative" but was surgically repaired. I just couldn't believe they tossed up that info for me during the game.

[identity profile] namasteyoga.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 08:02 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks. The sports guys at the paper where I used to work usually dreaded most getting the responsibility for writing the bowling coverage. I'm firmly convinced that the only reason the word "kegler" exists -- and the only place it's ever used -- is to give sports writers some other word for "bowler."

[identity profile] namasteyoga.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 08:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks. I don't know why people don't use sports more often in House-related fics -- other than that probably there aren't that many people whose interests cover both fanfic and football. It's a good excuse to give them something fun to do.

[identity profile] namasteyoga.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 08:05 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks. I still haven't decided how many of these fics there'll be. Like I said this was a dress rehearsal for my plans for the bowl game itself (if real life allows). I do want to work something in with Cuddy again, though.

[identity profile] namasteyoga.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 08:06 pm (UTC)(link)
Heh. I think Wilson has the inside track this time. Big Ten sports teams and bowl games are a very bad, very frustrating match. I suspect that half of the post-holiday depression that's out there is just coming from Big Ten fans.

[identity profile] namasteyoga.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 08:07 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, but Wisconsin lost to a good team. A friend of mine is heading to Madison for the game. His a Wisconsin grad, who also works for the University of Michigan athletic department. I asked who he was going to be rooting for: "The guys who sign my checks," he said.

[identity profile] namasteyoga.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 08:08 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks. I just wanted to avoid the whole macadamia nut pancake cliche. Again. I'm glad crepes was a good substitute.

[identity profile] namasteyoga.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 08:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks. I really don't know how many more I'll write. This best qualifies as an "occasional series," I think, but there will be at least a couple more.

[identity profile] namasteyoga.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 08:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks. My hope is to use enough football so it ties in to the "real world" aspects that guys like House and Wilson would follow, but not so many that it bores the non-football crowd.

[identity profile] namasteyoga.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 08:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Geez, Notre Dame has had such a crappy year even Michigan fans feel sorry for them. A little anyway. Well, actually the people I was with last night giggled when they saw that Navy beat Notre Dame for the first time since the 1970s.

I hadn't actually thought about continuing in another sport. This only got started because of the Appalachian State game, and how much fun Wilson would have had with it. No telling what will happen some March Madness, though.

[identity profile] silja-b.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 09:09 pm (UTC)(link)
I do follow the NFL - occasionally - but I haven't the foggiest about college football. It doesn't hurt the story a bit though. The exchange of clichés is hilarious.

[identity profile] npkedit.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 09:19 pm (UTC)(link)
Just caught this and this former sportswriter thought it was awesome.

Of course, all of NJ was down in the dumps over Rutgers and Navy finally beat Notre Dame (would love to have heard House commenting on that one), so it's not like anything happening in Michigan mattered anyway :)

[identity profile] namasteyoga.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 09:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks. I'm only a passing enthusiast in college football, but living in Ann Arbor (and two miles from Michigan Stadium) you sort of pick it up by necessity. Like: I need to go downtown, what time does the game start so I don't get stuck in traffic?

[identity profile] namasteyoga.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 09:36 pm (UTC)(link)
I thought about a Notre Dame mention, but I was still working my way around something else when that came up and it slipped past me. It was weird watching the game for fic purposes. Like the sweater vest comment? Golden.

[identity profile] anderov.livejournal.com 2007-11-04 09:43 pm (UTC)(link)
This is just me being an anal-retentive word-junkie, but "kegler" is German for "bowler".

(Which leaves the question of how the word entered English, although I would think it more likely that there's some hard-core German-descended bowling contingent in America than that some sportscaster actually resorted to foreign terms... Could be wrong, tho =)

Page 1 of 3